The Worst Movies of 2017

It’s that time of year again! Time to reflect on the fact because I still haven’t seen every movie I wanted to before making my top ten best of the year list (guys, seriously just have a wide release for ‘Phantom Thread’ and ‘Shape of Water’ already!) so instead I decide to end the year with a selection of the very worst 2017 had to offer. While I think there were more outstanding films in 2017 than there were last year, there were also more awful movies as well. That being said, at least this year the awful movies were interestingly terrible rather than the plethora of “meh” that dominated last year. So at the very least I have something to say about these disasters.

As per usual I have plenty of honourable mentions outside of the main top ten. Starting things off I have to mention ‘The Mummy’, the first and last instalment of the Dark Universe franchise, so it’s good thing they didn’t put any branding for said franchise in the midst of it like maybe in the opening logo of the movie because that would be REALLY EMBARESSING. Evidently director Alex Kutzman looked at the way everyone hated the sequel pandering, unresolved plotlines and gratuitous unfulfilled promises in his script for ‘The Amazing Spider-Man 2’ and thought “I should do all of that again”. Seriously, how can someone be so blind to their past mistakes?

‘Pirates of the Caribbean: What One Are We On Now?’ was also a predictably awful mess. I suppose unlike the previous Pirate sequels this one was more depressing than frustrating given that everyone other than the filmmakers seem to know that the franchise is long past its prime. ‘Snatched’ was an awful comedy but then again it did star Amy Schumer so I suppose I only have myself to blame for expecting anything else. ‘The Circle’ felt like someone was half paying attention to an episode of ‘Black Mirror’ (in related news Season 4 is amazing, at least I’ve recommended something good in this list) and swapped out any hint of intrigue or drama for the most generic and non-threatening message about technology you could imagine. Broadcasting yourself day in day out isn’t a great idea? Well no shit movie, thanks for telling me that.

There were also a big number of movies that were bad by virtue of how dumb they were. If someone had been in a coma for the past fifteen years and the first movie they saw upon awakening was ‘xXx: Return of Xander Cage’, they would be forgiven for thinking that cinema and society as a whole had made absolutely no progress whatsoever in that time frame. Mind you, that’s still more progress than ‘Geostorm’ and ‘Happy Death Day’ could even dream of making. Then there’s ‘Jigsaw’. Obscure fact; that was a movie released earlier this year.

I also feel like ‘Justice League’ deserves a mention. Maybe it’s an easy target at this point but it was honestly quite sad to see Warner Bros clearly so desperate to make ends meet on their superhero project that they essentially edited two entirely different films together, twice. ‘Bright’ was also something I wouldn’t want to inflict upon myself again, as was ‘Woodshock’. Finally we have ‘All Eyez on Me’, ‘Blind’, and ‘Unforgettable’, all of which were what I can only assume were Lifetime original movies that accidentally got a cinema release.

Biggest Disappointment – The Snowman

Though there were plenty of contenders for this spot including ‘The Bad Batch’, ‘Song to Song’, ‘Suburbicon’, and ‘Downsizing’. But nothing beats the colossal let down that was ‘The Snowman’. A cast and director this talented should not, even on their worst day, be capable of delivering a film as awful as this, and yet here it is to prove me wrong. It’s thriller than lacks any sense of tension, development or intrigue. The characters are as stale and underwritten as the central mystery, which is almost incoherent due to how the film has obviously been hacked to death in the editing room. There really isn’t any redeeming quality to it and I can’t for the life of me imagine why anyone would want to revisit it.

10: The Only Living Boy in New York

I had hoped that Mark Webb’s return to indie roots might yield some positive results after his disastrous turn at helming the ‘Amazing Spider-Man’ franchise, but somehow he managed to create something even worse than that. Whether it’s aiming to be a quirky take on romance of just a male fantasy, there’s nothing entertaining to be found in this movie. The characters are so shallow and unlikable that I defy anyone to genuinely care for the outcome of the events surrounding them. The plot doesn’t contain an ounce of anything that I would describe as intriguing or surprising. There’s no hint of visual flair to be found in the film. I saw just a few months ago but I’m struggling to remember anything about it.

9: Flatliners

That being said, when it comes to boring, nothing beats the remake of the 1990 science fiction film about a group of medical students try to stop their hearts for as long as possible before reviving themselves. As a horror movie it lacks any sense of fear, dread or anything even remotely interesting. It squanders a talented cast and interesting premise in favour of partaking in the most mind numbing horror clichés you can imagine. It falls flat on almost every conceivable level, mentioning a vague philosophical theme every now and then only to completely ignore it in favour of more stupidity.

8: Resident Evil: The Final Chapter

The only saving grace of this movie is that it’s title may actually be accurate, in which case we can be thankful that this is the final instalment of this franchise. I can’t get over how horrifically edited and directed this film is. There’s almost no cohesion to the way each shot leads into the next and some seem so quick that I swear they only used half a frame of footage to fill. The colour palette is a flat shade of nothingness and the CGI is an ugly mess that looks as if it was composited with a copy and paste programme. There’s one scene in particular, in which Mila Jovovich falls down an air vent and the way it’s filmed leads to belie that director Paul WS Anderson’s method of shooting was to throw the camera down the vent and just use the raw footage of that in the final product.

7: The Book of Henry

Some movies just have creative decisions that are so baffling I almost want to recommend them, just to experience the insanity first hand. This year, that movie is ‘The Boom of Henry’, Colin Treverrow’s …something. In all seriousness I do have an inkling of what Treverrow was trying to accomplish. I think he wanted to both pay homage and deconstruct the children’s adventure films of the 1980s, movies that placed young characters in scenarios that would be ridiculously implausible in any realm of reality. The problem is that Treverrow is so tone deaf that his creative decisions feel more like sincere attempts at drama rather than knowing winks, and his flat visual style, simplistic characters and muddled screenplay don’t help either.

6: Death Note

I’ll give Adam Winguard’s ‘Death Note’ this, I heard enough people hating on it while expressing love for the anime it was based on that I decided to check out the source material. The end result is that I hate this film even more for the disservice it does. I understand that adaptations have to be different, but those creative differences have to make sense. Thinking you can improve the original ‘Death Note’ by adding a cheesy 80s soundtrack, contrived teenage drama and ‘Final Destination’ style deaths shows a colossal misunderstanding of why your source works to say the least. It doesn’t work as an adaptation nor does it work as a standalone project with its total lack of atmosphere, terrible editing and characters so idiotic that they would be dead by the end of the first episode of the anime.

5: Rings

I think a lot of people have forgotten about ‘Rings’ this year, and I can’t say I blame them as it’s a human tendency to block out major trauma. It swaps the genuine terror and dread of Gore Verbinski’s ‘The Ring’ for cheap jump scares and a convoluted origin story that no one ever asked for. The characters are utterly flat and lifeless, as is the visual style of the movie. But what might be worst of all is the sheer desperation the filmmakers have to convince the audience they’re watching something scare. From the awful quick edits to the laughably terrible sound effects, ‘Rings’ isn’t even worth the effort to complain about it.

4: Transformers: The Last Knight

A story that’s derivative of its predecessors, characters that are completely unengaging as well as idiotic in their actions, a narrative that is nonsensical filled with too many plot holes to count, editing that seems content to only ever show you a single angle of a fight sequence in close-up rather than change its visual style at any moment, action scenes that are bland and unimaginative, blatantly plagiarising an element that you would find in any successful blockbuster of the past few years from  that visual cues of ‘Star Wars’ to car chases from ‘Fast and Furious’, failing at technical aspects that you would think are listed as one of the most fundamental basics of filmmaking. All this and more, and it’s not even the worst of the franchise.

3: Fifty Shades Darker

Though it’s a terrible film, I can at least understand the bare curiosity that drew audiences to see ’50 Shades of Grey’. But for the life of me I can’t comprehend what compelled anyone to see the sequel. An abomination of cheap tactics that throws so many subplots at the audience in the span of such a short runtime it verges on parody (there’s a whole helicopter crash in this movie that’s instigates, occurs and resolves itself in the space of ten minutes). I also defy anyone to find a romantic couple who share less chemistry than Blank Slate #1 and Blank Slate #2 (I’m inclined to think that they have names but I’m sure that’s just my memory serving me wrong), if anything they looked like they hated every minute of it. Well at least someone knows how I felt.

2: The Bye Bye Man

There’s no avoiding it. It’s terrible, terrible in ways you won’t even comprehend. The level of incompetence within ‘The Bye Bya Man’ almost defies belief.  Even the most basic components of filmmaking, such as lighting, camera angles, staging and location all seem so horribly off. There seems to be no limit to its incompetence as it seeps into every solitary aspect of the film and all of this is simply on a technical level. When you take into account how pitifully uneventful the film is, with each boring section only punctuated by the occasional outburst of bloodless violence it becomes even worse. From a quality standpoint ‘The Bye Bye Man’ is the worst film of the year, but it’s not as loathsome as my choice for the top spot.

1: The Emoji Movie

I don’t think anything cinema has ever produced comes close to the cynicism, laziness and contempt for your own audience than ‘The Emoji Movie’. Maybe that’s an exaggeration but the fact is that this is not a film. It’s a commercial that likes to think of itself as a movie. When brand recognition is your main priority in a movie, to an extent that you actively boast about how little you care for plot, character, humour, tone, quality of animation or anything remotely connected to the artistry of cinema, you get this. It’s bad enough that it’s an advert trying to cash in on trends, but what makes it worse is that the film is populated with the trends a studio executive thought was popular three years ago (and if an executive thinks they’re popular then they’re already three additional years out of date anyway) so by now that they’re eye-roll inducing just by mention. It’s an anti-comedy, an anti-movie. Something so devoid of any attempt at artistic merit or worthwhile filmmaking that it would be more enjoyably if you view it as a tragedy.

Best and Worst of October 2017

October was a month of highs and lows to put it lightly. I witnessed some of the finest films of the year bursting onto the scene but at the same time I also had to endure some of the absolute worst. It does say a lot that movies as superb as ‘The Meyerowitz Stories’, ‘Thor: Ragnarok’ and ‘Brawl in Cell Block 99’ didn’t make my top three of the month, but on the other end of the scale it also says a lot that I didn’t pick ‘Flatliners’, ‘Geostorm’, ‘The Snowman’ and ‘Jigsaw’ as the worst.

All in all I still maintain the 2017 has been a phenomenal year for movies. With two months left I can confidently say that even if the year ended now I would consider my current top ten to be a very strong line up, and with any luck the best movies of the year are still to come. Though with that being said I will consider myself shocked if anything manages to overtake the movie that I’ve put in the number one spot for October as it’s not only my favourite film of the month but also of the entire year to this point. So without any further stalling for time, here are the top three.

3: Good Time

One could almost say this movie was a rather good time…I’ll see myself out. In all seriousness the latest directorial effort from the Safdie bothers is a hyper stylised thriller that manages to equal said style with plenty of substance. It’s a heart pumping thriller that feels reminiscent of the kind of movies Sidney Lumet and Al Pacino would be making together, whilst also being breath takingly new and original in its presentation. Robert Pattinson delivers the single best performance of his entire career, well and truly standing out as a bold performer who is unafraid to play the most reprehensible of characters. ‘Good Time’ never fails to feel utterly involving on every level and is a movie I greatly look forward to visiting again.

2: Call Me By Your Name

In what might just be his best film yet (I mean it is a choice between this and ‘I Am Love’ so either way it’s a pretty decent choice) Luca Guadagnino brings forth a movie of stunning craft and endless emotional weight. It’s a film that is so masterfully constructed yet feels so effortless in how it presents itself. Featuring a number of fantastic performances, especially from its two leads Armie Hammer and Timothee Chalamet who bring such a humane element to the central romance that drives the movie, it’s a story of identity and passion that is as rich in substance as it is in visuals. The soundtrack by Sufjan Stevens is also phenomenal. ‘Call Me By Your Name’ is a film so intimate in scope, yet has so much to say about our very human condition that its appeal is endless.

1: Blade Runner 2049

I must admit that after my initial review I was worried I’d acted prematurely, and if this film might not be as watertight as I first thought. But the more I ponder over Denis Villeneuve’s science fiction masterpiece, the more I see it as a worthy successor to Ridley Scott’s original 1982 classic in every way, and praise doesn’t come much higher than that. ‘Blade Runner 2049’ is film that takes the ideas of its predecessor and rather than merely repeating them, evolves and furthers the discussion in ways I could never have imagined. Villeneuve’s craftsmanship is beyond impeccable, and his vision is one of the boldest I’ve witnessed in a long time. Its cinematography by Roger Deakins is mind bogglingly gorgeous, Harrison Ford and Ryan Gosling deliver performances that rank amongst their best and the movie is one of the most emotionally fulfilling experiences I’ve ever witnessed in a cinema. What else is there left to say, simply amazing.

And the worst…

The Only Living Boy in New York

I was willing to give Marc Webb another chance, I really was. I wanted to believe that once he was back in his indie roots he would bring forth a delightful film to rival his brilliant ‘500 Days of Summer’. But what we got instead was what seemed like a vanity project that can’t even hide the fact that it is just that. Putting aside the fact that the main characters last name is Webb, the portrait this movie paints seems so dishonest and contrived, as if it were some pre-pubescent wish fulfilment that treats its female characters as fragile objects and having a protagonist so unlikable I defy anyone to even feel mildly invested in what he is going through. The dialogue is ham fisted, the direction uninspired and overall the movie is simply boring as hell.   

Best and Worst of September 2017

As we head into the fall season of 2017, September gave us a very promising start as to where things were heading. Granted we do have to suffer through how lowest common denominator blockbusters have been replaced by lowest common denominator awards bait but on the whole the level of quality is still consistently good and has delivered some truly fantastic films in the process. We got to see artists pushing their unique visions through in some of the most remarkable films of the year in an uncompromising and viscerally bold way.  

That being said there was still the colossal disappointment that was ‘Kingsman: The Golden Circle’. Normally I try to avoid singling out certain films in this intro, but Matthew Vaughn’s spy sequel promised so much more than it delivered. It was truly a sequel that seemed to misunderstand what made the original so great and will only appeal to those who loved it for the most surface level reasons. But enough with that as there are still three truly great films to address.

3: First the Killed My Father

In what is undoubtedly Angelina Jolie’s best directorial outing yet, ‘First they Killed My Father paints a harrowing and intimately staged depiction of history that feels is both emotionally shattering but also brilliantly made. Jolie uses her protagonist to great effect not just in the way she is placed within the narrative, but the entire frame uses her as a symbol of innocence from which to contrast the horror of the war around her. As well as that, Jolie’s use of perspective fully immerses the viewer within this era of history, making it feel like an entity all of its own. It’s this intimate mind set that permeates every aspect of the movie, even its very structure which unfolds more like a survival story than a historical drama, namely because for those involved that’s exactly what it was.

2: Wind River

With this movie Taylor Sheridan proved that as well as being a masterful writer he also has great potential as a director. It really is staggering to think that ‘Wind River’ is only Sheridan’s second directorial outing as the movie seems to carry a sense of age and experience that is rarely found in early efforts. It weaves its plot and themes together so intricately that they feel essential to one another as Sheridan makes the landscape around his characters feel like a real entity. The movie also delivers two terrific performances from Jeremy Renner and Elizabeth Olson. It’s a movie that is focussed more on introspection and dread than conveying any cheap thrills, but that doesn’t stop Sheridan delivering some viscerally haunting moments that will linger with the viewer long after the credits roll.

1: Mother!

There are few films in recent memory that seem to have left a bigger impact upon those who have seen it than Darren Aaronofsky’s latest film ‘Mother!’. Love it or hate it, it’s a movie that has provoked a lot of discussion and a lot of encouragement to dig beneath the surface. I’ve seen several varying interpretations of the movie, from a biblical allegory to it being a statement on the environment, from a comment on an abusive relationship or meditating upon the struggles of an artist. Each new theory holds equal weight to me and all serve to deepen my respect for what Aronofsky has created. ‘Mother!’ is also a testament to Aronofsky’s talent behind the camera in how well it evokes a sense of unease from anyone that watches it. It’s disturbing on both an existential and visceral level, feeling like the closest thing one could possible come to filming a pure nightmare.  

And the worst…

Tulip Fever

At this time of year nothing brings me greater displeasure than the sheer blandness of historical period pieces like ‘Tulip Fever’. Even the movie couldn’t live up to its own promises of eroticism as it stumbles through a narrative it itself feels unconcerned with. None of the characters feel well developed or fleshed out, leaving it impossible for me to become invested in their plight. Even a cast as talented as the one found here can't make this feel interesting. There is no style or substance to be found within its drab, middle of the road display that in all honesty I’m struggling to remember anything about.

Best and Worst of August 2017

We have finally reached the end of summer movie season and, all things considered, it was pretty good. Granted we saw a number of unspeakable lows but we were also treated to some truly fantastic high points. Gone is the sheer, seemingly endless mediocrity of 2016 and instead we get the brilliance of ‘Wonder Woman’, ‘Baby Driver’, ‘The Big Sick’ and ‘Dunkirk’. Even the entries of the summer which I would regard as being good rather than great have been distantly refreshing in one way or another like ‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ and ‘Atomic Blonde’.

Despite some worries that it would end with more of a whimper than a bang, August was no different, maintaining a good level of quality that saw some excellent releases. Granted it is disappointing that Kathryn Bigelow’s ‘Detroit’ didn’t quite reach the levels of greatness I was hoping it would, the fact that a film that impressive didn’t make the top three is a testament to the high quality. Even the worst movie of this month was more frustratingly bland and uninspired in comparison to the source material rather than outright awful (but for the record, still pretty bad). But for now, here are the best.

3: Ingrid Goes West

In this bitingly sharp commentary on social media as well as our entire celebrity culture, we see a story that is as darkly humorous as it is broadly relevant. It completely immerses the viewer within its landscape and can make them feel equally as involved within its narrative whether they know what Instagram is or not. But as well as tackling the broader themes of our society, ‘Ingrid Goes West’ does so by being a fascinating character study of its titular figure by depicting an obsessed person who falls into the trap of using her obsessions ton escape from a harsh reality, who is brilliantly brought to life by a fascinating lead performance from Aubrey Plaza. It never gets caught up in its broader themes to a point where it forgets to be a movie and instead focusses on the interesting character dynamics as well as its ever intriguing plot.

2: Logan Lucky

Steven Soderbergh’s triumphant return to filmmaking may look like familiar territory upon first glance (a heist movie from the guy who is most famous for directing a heist movie, how remarkable). But beyond the genre, everything about ‘Logan Lucky’ from its central themes to its characters and whole stylistic approach feels fresh and innovative. Soderbergh creates empathetic characters that make the viewer feel instantly invested in their intricately laid plan, and then never resorts to mocking them for a cheap laugh but instead draws catharsis from their small victories. It boasts a fantastic cast who are all whole distinct in their roles to a point where every part feels like it could never be played by anyone else with Daniel Craig being the major standout. It’s energetic, highly entertaining and serves as a welcome reminder of why Soderbergh has been missed during his five year absence (it actually wasn’t that long of a retirement when you think about it was it?).

1: Dunkirk

I feel like, of all of Christopher Nolan’s films, ‘Dunkirk’ is the one most likely to be widely embraced as a classic. It has proven to be more divisive than one would think among audiences due to its complex structure and unconventional plotting, but it’s such a magnificent feat of intricate storytelling that the effect is unforgettable. Nolan brings forth some of the most terrifying and acutely tense set pieces in recent cinema history. He fully immerses the viewer within not only the immediate terror of war but also the deeper existential dread of having to confront death on a regular basis. As a filmmaker Nolan is in such command of his craft, pin pointing every solitary detail of his vision with such precision that it almost defies belief. ‘Dunkirk’ refuses to veer into contrived melodrama or artificial sentiment, it doesn’t need it. What it captures instead is a broader sense of emotion that fully captures the visceral nature of war, on a truly stunning level.

And the worst…

Death Note

I like Adam Wingard, he has a good knack for subverting conventional horror tropes and bringing them to life in a refreshing manner. It’s for that reason that I can’t accuse him of not trying when it came to Netflix’s live action American adaptation of the hugely popular anime of the same name. But his creative decisions simply do not work here. He fails to create any sense of atmosphere, any inkling of empathy for his characters as well as a complete lack of cohesive development or motivation. It is simply an adaptation that completely bypasses anything that made the original interesting. It’s not as bad as ‘Dragonball: Evolution’ or ‘The Last Airbender’ (excuse me while I vomit for a second) but for fans of the anime it must feel just as painful.

Best and Worst of July 2017

Well, we certainly aren’t in 2016 anymore. July only further signifies how the summer of 2017 is leaps and bounds ahead of those before it, with an array of interesting movies, a good portion of which were actually good. See, even the worst movies of this month were not bland in the same way that the worst of last year had been at this point, they have been uniquely awful in a way that almost feels refreshing. But getting back to those good movies, they have not only managed to be consistently good but also terrifically distinct in both their premise and their execution.

What is most remarkable is that I am giving all of this praise without even having seen one particular movie that it would be fair to say some people are mildly excited for (I’ll get around to seeing it soon, don’t worry). There were a number of excellent blockbusters that I honestly feel bad for not finding room for them in my top three of this month. ‘Spider-Man: Homecoming’ was an enjoyable and refreshing take on the superhero genre, while ‘War for the Planet of the Apes’ was a fantastic finale to one of the strongest trilogies in recent cinematic history. But alas, they did not crack the very best of the month.

3: The Big Sick

Having made a big splash at Sundance earlier in the year, this brilliantly subversive romantic comedy is based on the real life romance between writer/star Kumail Nanjiani and producer Emily V Gordon, which actually makes sense given that it’s a story so far out that it could only be based in reality. The movie never tries to create contrived drama in favour of focussing on the real human emotions that lie at the centre of the story, focussing on the quieter and more sobering aspects that ground it in reality. Each character feels empathetic and relatable but also manages to be immensely watchable as they navigate this difficult situation, something that the film’s terrific cast never fail to convey as the film moves on. It’s a movie that is as humorous as it is heart-wrenching, and is sure to please anyone who gives it a chance.

2: The Beguiled

Nearly two decades after her breakout feature ‘The Virgin Suicides’, Sofia Coppola brings us a movie that revisits the same themes of isolation and awakening that have been prevalent throughout her career but never more than in her first and latest features. With an ensemble that includes Nicole Kidman, Colin Farrell, Kirsten Dunst and Elle Fanning, the film displays a slow build of tension in which these volatile characters are thrown into a nerve wracking situation which Coppola approaches with restraint as well as a haunting beauty. It comes as little surprise that Coppola won the best director’s award at the Cannes Film Festival (becoming the second woman to ever do so) as her command over her craft is impeccable, fully capturing the unease that underpins the first half of the movie and the frantic dread of the second as events spiral out of control.

1: It Comes at Night

Not only the best movie of this month but also my new favourite of the year (sorry ‘Logan’), ‘It Comes at Night’ will undoubtedly leave some viewers cold, but for those ready to give into its provocative atmosphere it ends up being a highly rewarding experience. In a script almost entirely free of exposition, it focusses on the human drama of its story as well as bringing forth deep seated themes that play on our fears of the unknown. It paints a claustrophobic, isolated and paranoid portrait that due to a phenomenal sense of craftsmanship by director Trey Edward Shults, who deliberately upheaves the films pace and structure as it goes along to chilling results. It is patient and cathartic but never patronises its audience, allowing them to truly immerse themselves within the movie’s world and consider its themes on a more visceral level.

And the worst…

Blind

Of course it’s ‘Blind’, we all know it’s ‘Blind’. It’s a terrible, bland, melodrama that if anything makes me sad purely because I wonder how Alec Baldwin got here. So instead of going on about it, I thought I would take the time to address something else instead.

Movie that is so batshit crazy that I start to wonder what the fuck is going on once every few seconds, not just for this month or even year but in general…..

The Book of Henry

I feel like anyone who’s seen this movie is part of an exclusive club, a club of people who are forever changed because they have paid witness to Colin Treverrow’s mind boggling oddity that not only failed to understand the phrase “tonal consistency”, it single handily tracked down everything and everyone that could provide even the most vague definition of those two words and destroyed them immediately. With a script that juggles child geniuses, young friendships, abuse, assassination plots, brain tumours, grieving parents, authoritarian corruption and so much more, ‘The Book of Henry’ may be terrible, but it also has to be seen to be believed.

Best and Worst of June 2017

Just when I was starting to worry that 2017 would be a repeat of the monotonous summer of last year we get treated to the month of June, which despite having its fair share of duds brought us some truly brilliant movies. Whether it be new superhero icons, a musical heist movie or three decades worth of rock and roll, there were several films that shed light on brilliant stories in fantastic ways. This was the month in which I actually found myself liking a DCEU movie, proving miracles are capable. Even movies that I was highly anticipating still managed to surprise me with how exceptional they were and a few that I had no idea even existed left me completely floored.

Of course, as I said there were also a few misfires. Actually to say misfires would be implying I was looking forward to them at all. Universal learned too late why one should never trust Alex Kurtzman to head a major franchise but despite the terribleness of ‘The Mummy’ (sorry Tom Cruise) surprisingly it wasn’t the worst movie I saw this month, no prizes for guessing what was….But before that, here are the top three.

3: Wonder Woman

Patty Jenkins film may not be ground breaking in its narrative or style but in a way that is almost part of what makes it so brilliant. It harkens back to a more mythic age of superheroes, clearly being heavily influenced by Richard Donner’s ‘Superman’, possessing an almost timless quality to its heroism. The film endows its characters with genuine personality and empathy, allowing us as an audience to feel invested in their own battles, whether they be intimate of enormous. Against all expectations Gal Gadot managed to engrain herself into our minds as Wonder Woman, showing the distinct characteristics that make her a compelling person but demonstrating the emotional development that moulds her into a hero. A triumph for DC (finally!) as well as superhero movies in general.

2: Long Strange Trip

Even if you’ve never heard a single song by Grateful Dead, even if you despise their very existence I find it hard to believe that you would not find this documentary insightful, inspiring and engrossing from start to finish. It establishes a mood and atmosphere that places you within the era of the iconic band’s emergence and fame, creating an image of why their music resonated so deeply with the people of its time. It traces the lineage of a creation that spiralled out of control as it became more than the some of its parts could have even dreamed. It’s a character study of Jerry Garcia’s transition from a counter culture icon to a world weary rocker soldiering on. ‘Long Strange Trip’ is a brilliantly constructed piece of documentary filmmaking that has to be seen to be believed.

1: Baby Driver

Though Edgar Wright’s latest film is not without its flaws, from the underwritten characters to the somewhat basic narrative, its style and execution is so masterfully put together that I have to commend it as highly as I can. Not only does the style elevate it to a level of freshness and originality that I can guarantee very few films this summer will match, but ‘Baby Driver’ is justr so infectiously enjoyable from start to finish. It creates a world with real stakes and genuine consequences but is never afraid to have fun within said world. The characters are all wonderfully distinct and played brilliantly by the films supremely talented cast. But the real star was always going to be Wright, marking himself out as a distinguished modern director with a brilliantly unique take on every angle of filmmaking.  

And the worst….

Transformers: The Last Knight

I’m not surprised, I’m not even disappointed, I’m just sad. I’m sad that a studio holds their audience in such low regard to think that this is a movie that is acceptable to be shown to free thinking individuals. A redundant plot, idiotic characters with no development, blatant product placement, overt sexism and racial stereotypes galore. We have become used to Michael Bay’s regular laziness now but ‘The Last Knight’ takes it a step further by not even bothering to have a consistent aspect ratio for the movie’s runtime (Cineworld have actually put up a disclaimer ahead of the movie due to the amount of customer complaints they have received) as well as ideas that are stolen from a dozen more successful franchises. It may not be the worst of the ‘Transformers’ series but ‘The Last Knight’ still does a great job at representing the epitome of cynical and lazy filmmaking.

Best and Worst of May 2017

Despite a relatively strong start to the year, May of 2017 was a fairly lacklustre month. While there was still enough good movies to fill in the usual three spots, there was plenty of mediocre misfires that feels frighteningly reminiscent of the summer of last year. Hopefully things can improve in the coming months because I don’t think I can go through another summer that is so bad that ‘The Shallows’ is widely regarded as one of the better films of the season.

That being said while the blockbusters were somewhat disappointing the indie scene was as interesting as ever. For every movie I was anticipating that ultimately failed to live up to expectations I was also treated to a brilliant smaller movie that caught me by surprise. While I wouldn’t regard the best efforts of this month as perfect or ref8ned visions, they are brilliantly unique ones.

3: Colossal

While Nacho Vigalondo’s movie might not be a perfectly constructed piece of cinema, its concept alone is bold and unique enough to be marvelled at. But by adding a terrific blend of humour and drama supporting what is ultimately a character study of a damaged person, played brilliantly by Anne Hathaway. Hathaway continues to establish herself as a brilliantly talented actor whom is capable of tackling roles far larger than her roots in ‘The Princess Diaries’ would suggest (which is only fair, I mean I doubt anyone looked at the child star of ‘Jeepers Creepers 2’ and went “There’s Martin Scorsese’s next acting protégé). It plays ingeniously with its own genre, both subverting it while also adhering to what makes it unique and though it can be disorienting it’s highly interesting to watch.

2: I Am Heath Ledger

Any documentary to Heath Ledger could easily fall into the trap of analysing the movie star as opposed to the artist. But this excellent documentary showcases Ledger from the perspective of his friends and family, intercut with the actors own home videos that inject such an air of personal affection to the movie that it is difficult to not be instantly drawn in by it. The documentary sheds light on just how committed Ledger was to his craft, his ability to take risks within his career and further push his abilities as an actor. It may not address the elephant in the room but then again why should it? It sought to celebrate his life and work in the most intimate way it could.

1: Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 2

I wanted to recommend something other than the massive blockbuster everyone has already seen, but I can’t be dishonest to myself and say anything other than James Gunn’s intergalactic sequel was the best movie I saw this month. The entertainment factor alone is phenomenal, blending such a brilliant amalgamation of action and comedy that it is difficult to distinguish one from the other (say what you will but no other movie here opened with a tiny sentient tree dancing to Electric Light Orchestra’s ‘Mr Blue Sky) and as far as I’m concerened that’s their loss). But what is even better is how Gunn uses the framework of the sequel to further develop and analyse his characters, making them more empathetic and complex in the process. Given that the all-star cast have no trouble bringing said characters to life it’s not difficult to name this the best movie of the month.

And the worst…

The Circle

Though I would not exactly say I was highly anticipating this techno thriller, but with a talented cast and director I was certainly intrigued. However, despite directing the excellent ‘The Spectacular Now’ James Ponsoldt seems to have lost his skill at intimate crafted movies. Not only is ‘The Circle’ mind numbingly repetitive in what it is trying to preach, but it’s a message we’ve all heard before and nothing here makes it even remotely refreshing. The movie just seems so utterly flat and uninspired, with hardly a single aspect from the characters to the plot or direction, nothing sticks out even slightly. One could almost say the film just goes….round in circles. I’ll show myself out.

Best and Worst of April 2017

While April didn’t quite deliver a film capable of topping my annual list (for those interested ‘Logan’ is not only the film I still consider to be my favourite of 2017 so far but also the one that I genuinely believe is the best as well it still delivered a strong plenitude of films worth checking out. Admittedly the blockbusters were disappointing but even they had plenty of redeeming qualities. ‘The Fate of the Furious’ (still a dumb title) may have felt overly contrived in an effort to remain the un-ironic joke that it is but I can’t deny it was entertaining and ‘Ghost in the Shell’ for all its faults was fascinating on a visual level.

There was only really one film that lacked any merit, but more on that later. The movies that did shine above the rest were triumph of boldness and clarity. They all had a distinct style that was unique to the stories they were telling. Whether it be a gunfight, a societal taboo or an unsolved murder, each movie had their own method of telling a captivating tale. So without further stalling for time, onto the best of the month.

3: Casting JonBenet

This independent documentary made a big splash at Sundance and thanks to the magic of Netflix has been able to make an even bigger splash within the general public. Taking a unique approach to a widely discussed tragedy, Kitty Green’s film is not even about the murder of JonBenet Ramsey, it about our own obsession with it. The way we, and the actors within the movie, speculate and ponder over the details, theories and opinions that circle around the infamous case reveals that our own life experiences enforce the way we react to such an event. From the way the actors themselves each take a different approach to the roles that reflect their earlier opinions, to how their own experience with similar incidents leads them to subscribe to different theories. Despite some pacing issues the film has an eerily haunting tone that creates an utterly unique experience.  

2: Free Fire

‘Free Fire’ may not have the existential ponderings of Ben Wheatley’s other work like ‘A Field in England’ or ‘High Rise’ but what it lacks in that department it more than makes up for in sheer entertainment. Wheatley’s latest film represents an explosion of high octane, high concept filmmaking that is fuelled by a palpable energy the likes of which I have not seen this year. Its ensemble cast do a magnificent job of portraying an array of memorable characters. The self-contained action is utterly enthralling, mixed with an almost slapstick style of comedy and fast talking dialogue that each go hand in hand. The unspoken details of the movie such as its editing, cinematography and direction all work wonders to draw the viewer deeper into the script, and it works brilliantly.

1: Raw

Don’t be put off by the infamous stories of people fainting at its premier, because while ‘Raw’ is certainly not for the faint hearted it is far from the gratuitous gore fest those stories would have you believe. There is such artistic clarity to the movie both in its conceit, story and style. It’s meditate approach to such a brutal subject may be unconventional but it is part of what makes the movie so utterly unique. The film possesses this psychological intensity that unnerves the viewer more than any amount of blood and guts. Through this look at identity and our desire to belong, Julia Ducournau has crafted a story with so many unexpected twists and turns that you will struggle to look away out of intrigue alone.

And the worst….

Unforgettable

Too slick and polished on a visual level to be enjoyed as mindless schlock but too mind numbingly idiotic in its plot to ever be taken remotely seriously, as well as being bland in every other imaginable aspect, ‘Unforgettable’ may not be the worst movie of the year so far (they should be thanking ‘The Bye Bye Man’ for saving them) but it is most definitely in contention for the runner up spot. Complete with character motivations that are completely backwards, a non-linear story that fails to connect its own dots and a painfully contrived plot that make ‘Unforgettable’ a marvel of incompetence.

Best and Worst of March 2017

March was a wonderfully varied month and if the rest of the year is set to follow this standard then I would be very happy with 2017. Granted not every film was a success but even the lesser ones at least attempted to be different and progressive. But when it to the great ones they were on another level entirely. They displayed such a distinct and powerful sense of vision, taking genre tropes and subverting them brilliantly to a point where our own expectations were used as emotional weapons.

Whether it was exploring an aged superhero or tackling societal issues through a horror-comedy, this month displayed a promising array that filmmakers are not only still prepared to take risks but they are executing them brilliantly. The film industry should take note of the movies that have been released this month and realised what is missing from their modern blockbusters. So without further ado we turn to the best and worst of March 2017.

3: The Lost City of Z

James Gray’s adventure epic has been derided by some critics and by no means is it a perfect film. What it is however, is astonishingly haunting and hypnotic in its vision. It feels reminiscent of the stories of obsession and madness through exploration that were brought to us by Francis Ford Coppola and Werner Herzog. Its strength is through its mood and atmosphere, being more absorbing that emotional but no less commendable for that. There is a haunted, almost dreamlike quality to the film in its structure and it plays more into our deeper existential fears than allowing you to relate on an intimate level. Boasting a series of strong performances and some exquisite cinematography, ‘The Lost City of Z’ is an epic feat of filmmaking.

2: Get Out

As directorial debuts go, Jordan Peele’s first film is a terrific display of talent, social commentary and great horror filmmaking that is sure to go down as a classic of the genre. It is an engaging, complex and thought provoking examination of how overcompensating when handling race relations can still be a form of racism in that you are still seeing a person purely as a race, and not as an actual human being. But at no point does that message feel overtly aggressive or preachy. Even putting the social commentary aside it is a brilliantly made film, with Peele’s skills behind the camera shining through. It pays homage to numerous horror icons (Peele’s passion for the genre is obvious almost immediately) but also carves out its own distinctive visage to maintain a great sense of originality. I look forward to seeing what the future holds for Peele’s career.

1: Logan

The best superhero film ever made? Obviously it is far too early to make a statement quite as bold as that but ‘Logan’ undoubtedly stands as one of the best movies in the history of the genre, and the first one to truly transcend it since Christopher Nolan’s ‘The Dark Knight’. Hugh Jackman’s swansong to the character is violent and brutal in a way that few modern films are, but at its centre lies an emotionally resonant and thematically powerful core. Jackman gives a brilliant performance as does Patrick Stewart, in what will be their final outing for the franchise they have been with for the best part of two decades. James Mangold’s  direction gives every action and reaction a sense of weight on meaning, endowing it with such a meaningful quality. ‘Logan’ is more than just another comic book movie, it’s a parable about legends, legacy and the inevitability of time.

And the worst….

Power Rangers

I do feel bad for placing ‘Power Rangers’ at this spot, because it is far from a horrifically terrible film. In fact I admired the attempts it made to stand out from the crowd and be a more progressive kind of blockbuster through its characters. But sadly that is where the praise ends as the movie is so disjointed and tonally inconsistent that it feels like three other movies that have been smashed together. Combined with a second act that feels about as generic and uninspired as one can be as well as some of the most insultingly blatant product placement I’ve ever seen in a motion picture it has to fall here.